Oct 6, 2007

Coming Out of the Closet


If atheism is a religion, then, I am a recent zealous convert. I was born in a Catholic family but got married as a Mormon. I have never been passionate about any belief system as I am now passionate about atheism. I even created this blogsite to express my atheist views. Atheism is the most rationally convincing philosophy that I have encountered. Atheism has freed my mind from the bondage of superstitious religion.

Atheism is not a belief but rather a lack of belief in the supernatural, particularly belief in gods (including the Christian god). My conversion to atheism was a long and difficult process. My atheism is ironic, considering that I was brought up in a particularly religious family and I was educated in a Jesuit-run school. My father, although a policeman by profession, is a minister of a charismatic Christian group. My grandmother was a devout Catholic. She was an active member of the CWL (Catholic Women's League). My mother was also a devout Catholic. My mother kept all sorts of statues of saints and would regularly pray the rosary. Although father was tolerant about all these, he sometimes had some religious but sober arguments with mother. However, father was never able to convince mother that praying to saints for intercession was a form of idolatry.

The minor religious debates between father and mother never led to animosity between them. They both had their “biblical reasons” and were firm in their beliefs. However, as little children, it was difficult and confusing for my siblings and me. Our sense or religious affinity became a bit schizophrenic. How was it possible that our parents were both Christians but have conflicting beliefs? This was the beginning of my doubt about the validity of religion.

It is also ironic that the subjects in moral philosophy and philosophy of religion that I took up in college further reinforced my religious doubts. Hence, I became a Deist. I still believed in a supreme being but I doubted all religions. Nonetheless, I still listened to various religious groups. There was even a time that I became a sympathizer (although not a member of Bro. Eli Soriano’s group). I was even persuaded by an Iglesia ni Cristo minister to be indoctrinated. However, I was never baptized in the INC. Then the Mormon missionaries came to our house. The Mormon missionaries were the most friendly and amiable religious missionaries that I ever met. Unlike Bro. Eli’s group or INC ministers, the Mormon missionaries never struck me as arrogant or self-righteous. To cut a long story short, I was baptized as a Mormon. I got married as a Mormon. My wife and I became devout Mormons, attending church worship services and actively participating in different activities. Superficially, I am still a Mormon. However, when I probed into the deeper doctrines and history of the Mormon Church, I discovered that the church is a fraud. It cannot even be considered as a Christian church! My religious confusion just got worst. I felt betrayed!

So, I became an agnostic. My agnosticism led me to atheism. Atheistic philosophy is the most morally and logically convincing philosophy that I ever encountered. I became free from the bondage of confusion and fear that religion brings. Although I still recognize the merits of religion, I am convinced that religion only offers false hope. Presently, my wife and church friends are still unaware of my atheism. Hence, to some extent, I am still a “closet atheist”. My conversion to atheism was difficult but it gave me the freedom to think.


  1. Hey Homar!

    I came across your blog when I did a search of my blog on Technorati to see what came up. I was pleasantly surprised to see my blog on your roll.

    I've only perused here briefly, but it looks like you've got a pretty good blog here. I will add yours to mine later today, though I can't promise it will add noticeably to your traffic.

    If you have read much of my blog, you probably know that I was in the Philippines several months ago. Besides visiting my wife's family, we stayed at Bohol Tropics and Bohol Beach Club on Bohol, and the Shangri-La on Mactan Island. The Shangri-La was great and I look forward to staying there again on our next visit to the islands in 2010.



  2. I never converted to atheism - I reverted!!

  3. I can see how you have come to be an atheist. Your parents being of different [Christian] doctrines was no less confusing. It seems that you have just missed the boat. It's very difficult to compare Christianity to Buddhism. You can't even go by what the Catholics believe, because a lot of their traditions aren't found in the Bible...Mormons as well.

    Christianity is not a "religious" [religion]. It is so different that it stands out among all other if you truly know what it and the others are all about. I urge you to study the basics of Christianity, not just the Catholic and Mormon view. Go back to the roots. You will find that Jesus isn't comparable to Buddha, Mohammed, etc. Buddhists don't claim that Buddha is their savior or that is came directly from God. Muslims don't say that Muhammed is their savior either. In fact, Muslims believe Jesus will come back to judge the world, but they fail to see him as the savior. A fact that essential in salvation.

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